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Saint Money Land
The Holy Empire of Saint Money Land is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Dan Newman with an iron fist, and renowned for its aversion to nipples, unlimited-speed roads, and parental licensing program. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 776 million Customers are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources." The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Economia. The average income tax rate is 8.9%. The frighteningly efficient Saint Money Landian economy, worth 117 trillion M€s a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Arms Manufacturing. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 151,046 M€s, with the richest citizens earning 5.3 times as much as the poorest. The road to capitalism has proved an epic drama of adventure and exploration, teenagers are told they're not thinking about sex enough, the government is spending billions of taxpayer M€s to support "struggling" industries, and many aides in Dan Newman's office are known to be serial jaywalkers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Saint Money Land's national animal is the Salaryman, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests. Saint Money Land is ranked 19,311th in the world and 2nd in The Nelois Confederacy for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 4,544.02 on the Gilded Widget Scale. Important Figures: Money (Yes) Dan Newman (Leader of Saint Money Land ) Dave Newman (Brother of Dan Newman, was grandfathered into the role of Senator) Doug Newman (Was a boy but now is a girl, so Dan’s ex-brother. Was also grandfathered into Senator) Dick Newman (Saint Money Land Representative for The Nelois Confederacy) Vermont Supremacy (Sponsor of the Great Pony Races) Doug Cungking Saurus (General of the Military) Joey Jenkins (Owner of Dollar Mart) Sasukinov Kravlok (Owner of Cash House) Vorkma Naissru (Has 10% share of the nation’s wealth) Slightly Overweight Tony (Head of “Collection Agency” {Mafia}) Slightly Fit Daveid (Head of the E.I.U. {Economic Investigation Unit} Is also Slightly Overweight Tony’s Brother) Hugo Bagel (Owner of Hugo’s Bagel Shop, which has locations all throughout the Nelois Confederacy, and all proceeds go to Saint Money Land with 1% going to Vorkma so my country doesn’t get kicked) Bort Sompsin (Eats from every Hugo’s Bagel Shop location in the Nelois Confederacy) That Guy From Monopoly (Runs the Big Money Bank on Cool Kid Avenue) Cooeggy Gibson (CEO of Amazonian Shipping Inc.) Nathanniale Jimmynezesez (Random hobo that farms carrots in my backyard. I’ve tried to spray him away with weed killer but he keeps coming back. Gonna have the “Collection Agency” “collect” him tomorrow *wink*) Jerry-John Jerry James John Jack Jum (The Bigtopian Representative That Everyone Hates) Berry-Bohn-Berry-Bames-Bohn-Back-Bum (The Maxtopian Representative That Everyone Loves) Kerry-Kohn-Kerry-Kames-Kohn-Kack-Kum (The New Colian Representative That Everyone Tolerates) Roebald Beahgan (Produces Saint Money Land’s signature alcohol, the Money Maker) Female Unit #001 (First Ever A.I Citizen in Saint Money Land) Male Unit #001 (Second Ever A.I Citizen in Saint Money Land) Robby the Robber (Biggest Threat to the Economy, if Caught, he will be Executed Immediately)